Seeking validation and approval from a partner is something that drains and stresses a relationship.

Although it feels nice to receive affirmation from a partner, we should never need them to feel okay about ourselves or valued; that must come from within, and it does for an emotionally healthy person.

If you struggle with feeling valuable and worthy, repeat these affirmations to yourself daily: I am worthy. I am valuable. I am complete within.

When you choose to acknowledge your value and learn to appreciate yourself, you become healthier emotionally. You start becoming more of an equal in your relationships. You tend to be more open and honest with the people in your life, especially about your needs and boundaries. You’re more available emotionally, too.  

Choosing to value yourself isn’t selfish. It’s necessary to improve the quality of your life and relationships. If you don’t truly love, value, and respect yourself, how can anyone else? You teach people how to treat you by how you treat yourself.

Here are five ways to start valuing and appreciating yourself more; your love and happiness are in your hands.  

1. Be Comfortable with Failure and Learn From Your Mistakes

Elon Musk said, “If things are not failing, you are not innovating enough.” People who aren’t learning and growing don’t make mistakes. Sometimes we make mistakes that we regret. Welcome to life. It happens. Instead of dwelling on your failures and mistakes and feeling guilty and ashamed, learn and grow from them instead.

How you respond to mistakes and failure reveals a lot about the kind of person you are. Do you see failure as the end or an opportunity to grow and become better?

A person who values themselves sees mistakes and failures as stepping stones towards something better.

Instead of punishing yourself with negative self-talk and disempowering statements after a setback, ask, What can I learn? What will I do differently next time?

Mistakes are opportunities to learn and grow into a better life and future. Embracing this mindset is a sign that you value yourself.

Choose to see yourself as a person of value who is learning and growing every day.

2. Be True to Your Values and Standards

No one should get to choose what matters most to you. Live your life. Identify your values. Set your standards. Embrace them and live by them.

Even when you have a rough day and things don’t work out as planned, if you stayed true to your values and standards, the day was a personal success. If you gave it your all and stayed true to yourself in the process, you have nothing for which to be ashamed. Respect your efforts. Be proud that you didn’t compromise. Celebrate your integrity and honesty.

3. Don’t Settle

If you’ve been settling for less than you deserve, stop. Settling devalues your worth, needs, and interests. Why settle for a job that doesn’t fulfill you or a relationship in which you’re not treated well, or a friendship that brings you down all the time?  

What are some relationshis or situations you’ve settled for and have become used to that you know need to change? You deserve a life of love, health, happiness, and success, as long as you don’t expect them to be handed to you on a silver platter while you sit around doing nothing; you must take inspired action. But settling for less than you deserve from life is a sign that you don’t value yourself. So, stop settling.

4. Stop Comparing!

Comparing yourself to others shifts your focus away from you and your life. Why worry about them anyway? Why envy their life when you have a life of your own to live and enjoy? Instead, focus on the vision you have for your life. If you don’t have a vision for your life, make one; it doesn’t have to be perfect; it can even be a little blurry at first. 

What vision do you have for your health, finances, career, relationships, and overall well-being? Start living the life you’ve been dreaming of by changing yourself! Set goals and take inspired action to reach them. You are your only competition. Life is a gift. Value it. And live with passion and purpose.  

5. Live With Passion

You deserve the opportunity to pursue happiness. Follow your dreams, embrace your passions, and focus on living your purpose! 

Figure out your calling, and then start living it because life is about leaving a legacy. Living this kind of take-charge life demonstrates that you value yourself. People will see that you value yourself and start interacting with you in much healthier and more respectful ways. People will start valuing you more when you pay attention to creating a life of happiness, purpose, love, and joy. 

But the important thing to remember is that you’re not doing it for them; you’re doing it for you. The result is that not only will your life improve, but your relationships will, too, especially the one with your intimate partner.

Final Thoughts

Your relationship with yourself is the most important one you will ever have because you live with yourself 24/7. You came into this world alone, and you will leave it alone. 

Identify your needs, get clear on what you want and don’t want in the significant areas of your life, and take inspired action towards reaching your goals. Start living as a person of value today.