Most married people would never admit that they’re not always nice to their spouses or that they need marriage advice on how to be nicer to their spouses. However, marriage can be challenging and frustrating at times and during those times it can be hard not to nitpick.

The happiest married couples have five positive interactions for every negative one. In contrast, most couples that end up divorced have less than one positive interaction for every negative interaction. Here is some marriage advice to help be nicer to your spouse and increase the number of positive interactions for a happy marriage.

Appreciate your Partner

When spouses neglect to appreciate each other, it’s only a matter of time before they start taking each other for granted. Genuine gratitude on the other had can go a long way to make interactions between spouses much more positive.

Make a habit of expressing gratitude to your spouse every day. You don’t have to wait until they do something major to appreciate them. Thank them for making dinner, picking the kids from school, picking something up from the store, doing chores and other every day things like that.

Take a time out when things get heated

Whenever you feel like your temper is getting out of hand, take a breather, calm down and return when you have had a chance to process your emotions. However, before you walk away, tell your spouse that you’d like to take a break and revisit the issue when you’re calmer. Walking out angrily without explaining your intentions will only make things worse.

During your time apart, brain storm possible solutions and compromises. This way, it’ll be much easier to reach a resolution when you eventually talk to your spouse again.

Acts of kindness

Nothing says “nice” like doing kind gestures for your spouse. Simple things like helping them with an important item on their to do list, making them dinner and offering to do some of their chores when they are really busy can go a long way.

If want to do something much more special, you can make them breakfast in bed or get them a thoughtful gift just too let them know that they’re always on your mind even when you aren’t together.

When you’re angry and frustrated, it’s easy to say unkind things that you’ll later regret. Hopefully with the above marriage advice, you can slowly learn how to be nicer to your spouse.