On Valentine’s Day, I can’t think of a better topic for us to investigate.  True Love.  What is it?  Do we share true love with our chosen special someone?

True love is often thought of as an emotional connection, something felt deeply and intensely. But if we look beyond the initial spark of attraction or that “butterflies in the stomach” feeling, what truly defines lasting, authentic love?

True love, in its deepest form, is selfless. It’s not about what you can gain from the relationship, but what you can give to your partner. It’s about showing up, and giving your time, energy, and affection without expecting anything in return. But what does this selflessness actually look like in practice? And how can you cultivate it in your own marriage?

The Power of Selfless Love

A person who loves selflessly is more concerned with their partner’s needs than their own. This doesn’t mean neglecting your own well-being, I want to be very clear about that point.  But loving selflessly does mean that in the balance of your relationship, giving is prioritized over receiving. Did you catch that?  Giving is prioritized over receiving. When you love without strings attached, your focus shifts toward making your partner feel valued, supported, and cared for in ways that go beyond what’s easy or convenient.

So here’s the question: How selfless is your love?

Reflecting on Your Selflessness

Think about it—when was the last time you acted with the sole intention of making your spouse’s day better without expecting anything in return? How does your love reflect genuine care for your partner’s happiness, well-being, and needs?

Now, take that reflection a step further. How can you show more selfless love in your everyday life? It could be as simple as surprising your spouse with a small act of kindness, like making them their favorite meal or taking care of a task they’ve been putting off. Or it could be something more significant, like offering your full support during a stressful time or setting aside your own desires to meet your partner’s needs.

A Path to a Stronger, Healthier Marriage

If you want a stronger, healthier, happier, and warmer marriage, then it all starts with loving selflessly. True love doesn’t expect to be reciprocated in equal measure every time; rather, it thrives on the pure joy of giving without asking for anything back. When both partners are committed to this kind of love, the relationship flourishes and deepens.

But here’s the catch: selflessness in love is something that takes practice. It requires a willingness to continually check in with yourself, to evaluate how you’re loving your spouse, and to be open to change. How selfless is your love? I’d love to hear about your journey and the progress you’ve made toward loving more selflessly.  Pop us a note!