Do you know what a healthy marriage looks like?

Most of us know what unhealthy relationships look like. We know that physical abuse, constant conflict and name calling have no place in a healthy relationship.

However, it is not enough to know what you don’t want in your relationship. You also have to know what your goal is and what your marriage is going to look like once you achieve your goal.

What does a healthy relationship feel like?

The quickest way to determine whether you are in a healthy relationship is to think about how it makes you feel. A healthy relationship feels safe, nurturing, comfortable and fun.  You should be able to disagree with each other and resolve your conflict without fear or threats. Being able to say “no” without being made to feel guilty or feel pressured into making sacrifices for the relationship at your own expense is also a sign of a healthy relationship.

A healthy happy marriage is also full of joy and laughter. This doesn’t mean that there aren’t moments when you are angry at each other or sad. It just means that you spend more time laughing and doing fun activities together.

Boundaries

Healthy marriages are all about boundaries. You should be able to talk to each other about what you are and are not comfortable with regard to family, friends, finances and personal space.

For instance, both of you should also be able to spend time with friends and family without being required to check in every hour and without abusing technology to check on each other.

Communication

The most important aspect of a healthy marriage besides boundaries is a communication. The way a couple communicates indicates how healthy or unhealthy the relationship is.

You know you are in a good marriage when you can talk to each other openly and respectfully about your thoughts and feelings and feel heard. Even when your opinions differ, you should be able to come together and find a compromise without either of you feeling like they’re sacrificing too much.

While a healthy relationship goes beyond feeling good, having clear boundaries and communicating effectively, you should be able to know whether or not you’re in a good marriage by looking at these three areas of your marriage.