Get Better at Communication in Relationships by Listening
Poor and ineffective communication in relationships is very common. Many marriages end because one spouse feels that they are not heard or understood by their partner or that their opinion doesn’t count in decision making. Communication is something that every couple has to work on so as to have a happy marriage.
Not listening can be a defense mechanism. If one spouse feels unfairly judged or blamed, he or she may tune out the other spouse in conversations. This in turn causes the other spouse feel ignored and dismissed. It becomes a vicious cycle.
Ideally, spouses should be able to listen to each another even when they don’t agree. Each person should be able to speak and have his or her thoughts and feelings acknowledged. Sometimes, that’s all a couple needs to do to learn how to fix a marriage.
Listening for Better Communication in Relationships
Don’t interrupt your spouse. When your spouse starts talking, let them finish what they are saying before you speak. Your point is important but so is theirs.
Don’t jump to conclusions. Regardless of whether you have had the same conversation before, don’t assume you know what your partner wants to say. Also, don’t start figuring out how you are going to respond before you have heard the entire piece.
Restate what you heard, to ensure that you are both on the same page. You can say, “What I hear you saying is . . .” This feedback technique assures your spouse that you were listening. It also gives your spouse the opportunity to correct you if you restate the point wrongly.
Watch the body language. Body language conveys 55% of the message. Therefore, you should be aware of your own and your spouse’s tone of voice, facial expressions and other mannerisms such as shrugging of shoulders or tapping of fingers. They can give you an insight into how your spouse really feels.
If you have always wanted to be better at communication in relationships, now is your chance. Try these tips today for a happier marriage.