How to Fix a Broken Marriage: Comprise and Cooperate
Happy marriages are built on compromise and cooperation. Unfortunately, many people who are looking for tips on how to fix a broken marriage find it hard to compromise. They believe that it is possible to have their needs and wants met all the time, which is simply not true. Marriage is a partnership and both parties must be willing to yield in order to enrich the partnership. One spouse’s needs and preferences should not take preference over the other’s needs and preferences. Also, one spouse should not call all the shots while the other meekly obliges.
How to Compromise and Cooperate
- Listen actively – the first step of compromise and cooperation is listening. Don’t assume you know what your spouse needs or wants, regardless of how long you have been married. Ask your partner what he or she would like and listen and ask questions for clarification.
If your spouse is used to you making all the decisions and issuing orders, he or she may respond to your questions with “whatever you decide is fine by me.” This response is a classic sign of someone who has resigned him or herself to agreeing for the sake of peace in the marriage. You can encourage your spouse to speak up by explaining that you value his or her opinion and want to know what he or she thinks.
- Reach a Compromise – When you know what your spouse wants you can come to a compromise. Compromising is a process, hence the term “reach a compromise.” You and your partner should outline and consider all possible options before making a decision. While doing so, you may come across an option that you both like or can live with. For instance, you may agree to do an activity that your spouse wants and incorporate some of your own ideas into it.
- Collaborate – Compromises often feel like lose/lose situations. Couples that remain in the compromise stage too long often grow to resent each other. Every couple should strive towards a collaborative relationship, where both parties call the shots and are equally considerate of each other. In a collaborative marriage, no one feels like they are giving up too much or being a doormat. Both parties thrive as individuals and are supportive of each other.
Many couples today have a hard time compromising. Also, those who find it easy to compromise often do it for peace in the marriage, which isn’t a good reason. Learn how to fix a broken marriage by listening to your spouse, asking questions, reaching a compromise and collaborating. Follow this simple advice for newlyweds for a happy marriage.