Relationship Tips for a Happy Marriage Part 41: Making Love
More than 15-20 percent of married couples – including Christians- in America are in a relationship without physical intimacy. This means that they are having sex less than 10 times in a year!
Sexless relationships are often lonely and emotionally unfulfilling because the couples miss out on the unique connection that comes from sexual intimacy. It’s also not uncommon for the parties to feel rejected and hurt.
All these feelings together can result in low self esteem and greater vulnerability to temptation, both of which are recipes for disaster in any marriage.
Finding fulfillment in love making
Sexual intimacy should be fulfilling for both parties. After all, it is impossible to look forward to something that you do not enjoy.
The key to sexual fulfillment is giving yourself completely to meet your spouse’s needs. God created us as sexual beings so that husbands and wives could serve each other selflessly, in love.
Many married people focus too much on their own needs and not enough on their partner’s needs. In this way they completely disregard the needs and desires of their partners. Unfortunately, selfishness has no place in Christian marriage.
The marriage bed must be a place of mutuality—the husband seeking to satisfy his wife, the wife seeking to satisfy her husband. This is exactly what apostle Paul meant when he said in 1 Corinthians 7:3-4 “Let the husband render to his wife the affection due her, and likewise also the wife to her husband”
Fulfillment may also be achieved by trying new things such as changing the environment and place where you make love. Marriage is a safe space where couples can experiment sexually – within reason – without fear of being judged or rejected. So feel free to try all those new ideas that you have been having!
Increase physical intimacy in your Christian marriage
Married couples are notorious for making excuses when it’s time to make love. Some common excuses include being too tired, being too self conscious and not having enough time. Obviously there are some situations such as illness or postpartum recovery that can prevent a couple from enjoying physical intimacy but these situation do not occur very often. Truth-be-told, as long as you’re looking, you will always find a reason not to be intimate with your spouse.
If you need to make some changes to your schedule so that you are not too busy or tired to make love to your spouse, do it. Remember, you do not need to have a gourmet love making session filled with special, time-consuming romance every single day. Variety is after all the spice of life.
If like most married couples you desire an active and fulfilling sex life, follow these tips today to get started on your journey to a happier, more fulfilling marriage.