Saving Your Marriage For the Children's Sake
Divorce or getting separated is a relatively simple process for adults. Although difficult, many are able to cope effectively after a separation despite its impact on their personal and family lives with its resulting stress, loss of belongings and social instability.
However, when children are involved, it’s good to be mindful that they experience a great deal of worry and stress. Their entire being is affected psychologically, physically, socially and emotionally. And their future is filled with uncertainty. Which is why couples are advised to give their marriage a second and third chance if for no other reason than for the sakes of their children.
A child’s world revolves around his parents; he knows that he can depend on them for all of his daily needs and affection. It’s deeply disturbing to a child when his parents separate, and he often becomes restless and faces emotional challenges.
Custody cases can make it even worse because now the child must decide between mommy or daddy. Imagine the pain of having to choose between two people you love dearly. This thought alone is why some parents go the extra mile to work through their marital conflict so as to spare their children this pain.
If a divorce goes through, then both the parent with custody and the child potentially face the burden of financial stress. Some children of divorced parents may also face discrimination in certain communities where divorce is frowned upon. This, added to any feelings of anger, loneliness, or insecurity, can cause a child to act out, and lead to problem behavior.
All aspects of a child’s life are affected when parents separate.
Many children have difficulty coping with divorce, and can often feel helpless, lonely and frustrated. This may lead to health problems like difficulty with sleeping. Older children may resort to alcohol abuse, drug addiction, violence, even suicide.
Although it might be unpopular these days for me to say this, I’ll say it anyway, parents please think twice before pursuing divorce or separation. I know it takes a lot of effort to save your marriage, but please consider divorce’s impact on your children – let this motivate you to give it one more try.
Decide to today to work though the conflict in your relationship and do whatever it takes to find resolutions. Remember to talk, listen and be considerate during the process; seek professional help to restore your relationship.
Trust me, your children will thank you for it.