How to Stop Divorce
How to Stop Divorce and Save Your Marriage
It can be done, so take heart.
But here are two things to consider when attempting to stop a divorce:
First, how far along are you in the divorce process?
Secondly, what does your spouse think about your attempts to stop divorce and save the marriage?
If you haven’t filed your divorce papers yet, then it might be possible to stop divorce simply by you and your spouse agreeing not to file. Usually it isn’t very difficult to persuade your spouse to put the divorce process on hold for a while.
Now, once you have put the divorce process on hold, it is time to see a marriage counselor for advice on how to save your marriage. Soak up as much marital advice as you can during this time and apply what you learn because it will reinforce your efforts to stop divorce.
If the divorce papers have already been filed, then it will be more difficult to stop divorce. And here’s why. In the United States, and most of the western world, it is possible to get a “no fault” divorce. These “no fault” divorces make it extremely difficult for spouses to stop divorce once the divorce papers have been filed. Although the couple may be required to separate for a period of time before finalizing the divorce, the court will approve the divorce at some point.
A divorce may be either contested or uncontested. An uncontested divorce happens when the two parties reach an agreement regarding all matters that relate to the divorce. This includes the division of property and custody of the kids. Lawyers are usually involved in helping a couple reach an agreement before the matter goes to court. Sometimes if the court is busy, you can stop divorce (delay) for a while. However, most of the time, an uncontested divorce goes through very fast once it is brought before the court.
In the old days of “fault divorces,” it was easier to stop divorce. All you had to do was prove you were not guilty of the fault you were being accused of. The most common faults were adultery, abandonment and cruelty. Fault divorces were especially difficult for the victim since the intimate details of the marriage were exposed in court. The defense was rarely successful in “fault” divorces.
In “no fault” divorces, if the parties fail to agree on all the issues before filing the divorce papers, then the divorce may take longer than expected. The court will have to decide on all pending issues including division of property and custody of the children. This may allow a period of time in which you may try and stop divorce.
Please understand that I am not an attorney and that this post on “stopping divorce” should in no way be considered to be legal advice. So please do yourself a favor and obtain the services of an attorney in your effort to stop divorce.
Keep in mind that even if you succeed in stopping divorce right now, your spouse may not want to continue living with you. He or she may insist on separation so as to discourage you from trying to save the marriage. However, if he or she is open to seeing a marriage counselor, then stopping the divorce and saving your marriage might not be as difficult as you thought it would be after all.