Many people are afraid to be in a long distance marriage. This is because even in this internet age, where couples have more than enough communication technology at their disposal, long distance couples still struggle to stay mentally and emotionally connected. This disconnect is usually a direct effect of living apart.

The biggest challenge for long distance marriages

Most people approach long distance relationships from a place of fear. Fear that they will grow apart as a couple. Fear that their spouse will not stay faithful.  Fear that they will be overwhelmed with responsibilities because their spouse can’t help out anymore.

If you are in a long distance marriage, you need to approach it from a place of faith rather than a place of fear. Only when you distance yourself from fear will you find the strength to push forward and make your marriage a success.

How to keep a long distance relationship going

Communicate

It goes without saying that communication is essential to maintaining a healthy and fulfilling long distance relationship with your spouse. You need to talk to each other about serious things such as finances, parenting, fears and expectations, as well as trivial things such as the weather or what you did that day. Ideally, you should communicate daily. So, discuss your schedules and come up with a time that works for both of you.

Don’t make unsubstantiated accusations and judgments

If your marriage is going to survive, you need to trust your partner and treat them with respect. Don’t get into the habit of making unnecessary accusations or passing judgment on situations without making an effort to get all the facts. You need to believe that your spouse will not do anything to hurt you or your marriage intentionally.

Don’t be too clingy or needy

If you are afraid that you and your spouse will grow apart, that fear will manifest itself in form of clinginess and neediness.  This will cause your spouse to long for more space and pull away from you. This distance will in turn make you clingier. The only way to break this cycle is to overcome the fear that the two of you will grow apart.

Spend time together

Spend as much time as possible together sharing laughs, love and intimacy. Do not to spend all your time together sorting out your issues and marital problems. Your time together is an opportunity to refill each other’s love tanks. If you can’t be together for whatever reason, send each other care packages, photos and letters.

Living apart from a spouse is no walk in the park. However, you can make long distance marriage easier for yourself and your spouse by communicating daily, trusting each other, not being too clingy and spending as much time as you can together.