Are you tired of being a prisoner of your past?

Sick of wallowing in maybes, or would’ve, could’ve, should’ve? 

For the sake of your happiness and the well-being of your closest relationships, especially the one with your romantic partner, give yourself the gift of a fresh start this Christmas.

Use these five life-liberating steps for letting regret go once and for all to begin unlocking your best life (and your best relationships).

Learn The Lesson

Each burdensome regret we carry contains a hidden lesson. We stay stuck in our cycle of behavior until we learn that lesson. 

Fear is a common source of regret. 

We don’t pursue our passions because we’re filled with self-doubt or are afraid of what people might think. 

We choose the safe option instead of the road less traveled because we’re afraid of what lies ahead and what we might lose. Fear sabotages our potential and success. The result? Regret. 

What do you regret, and why? 

What lesson do you need to learn?

Master that lesson to begin unlocking your best life. 

Forgive Yourself

Regret is emotional punishment. But what’s the point of beating yourself up? How does it serve you and the people in your world? 

Perhaps it’s time to forgive yourself. 

Show yourself a measure of mercy and compassion. 

Although you can’t change the past, make it serve your life today by becoming a better person who has more to offer. 

Make Amends With Others

Often, our regrets are centered on people we’ve hurt.  

Maybe you had a string of failed relationships that you regret because you could have handled them differently. 

Instead of wishing and fantasizing about where everything could have changed, you might reach out to the people you hurt with your words and actions and try to make amends.

Apologize, connect with them, consider restoring the relationship to the extent that it’s healthy or possible. Don’t let fear get in the way of healing. You’d be surprised how far a heartfelt apology goes towards healing regret. 

Talk To Someone

Regret chains you to the past if you let it. It engulfs your mind and soul with darkness until you slip into depression—your whole well-being suffers, especially your emotional health. 

One of the best things you can do is find a trusted friend or, better yet, a counselor with whom to talk. They will pull you out of the negative cesspool whirling in your head and get you to focus on positive, productive activities and solutions. 

Whether a family member, therapist or close friend, you need to find someone to speak to before your regrets get out of control. 

Consider Possible, Positive Outcomes

No matter how bad things were, consider if anything positive can come from it. You’re bound to find something if you think long and hard enough. Take your power back by making it serve you and others. 

And to the extent possible, replace your regrets with positive experiences. If you regret losing that “perfect” someone who got away, consider dating again. 

If you regret ignoring your passion and choosing a safer career instead, explore ways to make your passion part of your daily life and how to make some money doing it.

Choosing to experience positive emotions and situations that are the exact opposite of your regrets is a great way to weaken their hold on you. 

By learning the lesson each regret contains, forgiving yourself, making amends, talking with a trusted friend or therapist, and focusing on positive outcomes, you’ll start to break free from some of the mistaken beliefs about your regrets and experience life as a much better person. 

Not only will you be happier, but your relationship with your romantic partner will be healthier and improve almost immediately. 

Give yourself the gift of letting regret go this Christmas for your sake and the sakes of those you love.