Surviving the End of the Honeymoon Phase
When people first begin to fall in love, they experience several emotional highs as a result of the chemical changes happening in their brains. Scientists say that these highs are similar to those experienced by people who suffer from bipolar disorder. It’s no wonder that romantic love doesn’t last long. In fact, these emotions tend to subside after two years giving way for more mature love.
Unfortunately, many married couples have a hard time navigating the transition to mature love. They panic and begin trying to recapture the romantic feelings they once felt. This is why many affairs and divorces happen during the first two years of marriage.
What these couples fail to realize is that mature love is a lot better than romantic love. When a couple is mature in love, they experience a deeper and more meaningful connection. This doesn’t mean that their long term relationship is devoid of romance. It means that there is a balance between intense emotions and a deep, meaningful friendship.
The Case for Mature Love
Mature love commands a higher and deeper level of commitment. In the presence of mature love, spouses are more motivated to remain loyal, faithful and respectful of each another. This creates a sense of peace and security about the relationship and allows you focus on doing what’s best for your marriage. The anxiety that often characterizes new relationships becomes a thing of the past.
Mature love is the perfect combination if intimacy, passion and commitment. When a couple is able to discuss their desires, fantasies, fears and dreams openly, their intimacy and passion also grows. It is nice to know that you can discuss anything with your spouse without fear of judgment. These deep discussions can also help with problem solving and decision making in a healthy relationship.
Mature love, unlike romantic love, doesn’t come easily. Making the transition from romantic love to mature love is a choice and it requires hard work. In fact, many couples need counseling to get there. However, the payoff is more than worth it because maturity improves marital satisfaction and keeps the relationship from going stale. Don’t be one of those couples that cling to the honeymoon phase even after it is long gone. Learn to embrace mature love.