Is Love All You Need?
Can a marriage succeed on love alone? Some people seem to think so! It’s why there are so many songs, movies,books and other creative works called “love is all you need.”
The truth, though, is that it all depends on your definition of love. If you think love is a fairly tale, sweep me off my feet, lovey dovey feeling, then you’ll probably not be happy to hear that that a marriage cannot succeed on that kind of love.
Fairy tale love fades, and when that happens the nature of your relationship and marriage changes. You may begin regretting the marriage and start thinking of ending it. Alternatively, you might continue to live together out of a sense of obligation without realizing that there is more to love than the lovey dovey feelings that usually accompany the honeymoon phase.
The kind of love that can sustain a marriage beyond the honeymoon phase has a lot more to do with caring selflessly for your spouse than “butterflies” in your stomach. The reason why divorce and infidelity rates were much lower a few decades back, is because couples actually cared for one another. To them a love was both a decision and a feeling deeply anchored in commitment.
Learning to care for your spouse, is one of the most important things you can do to make your relationship last forever or until death do you part.How do you do that? By putting your selfish desires aside and making your spouse’s needs your priorities.
Sadly,when the honeymoon phase ends, many people tend to think they made a mistake, or feel that they aren’t happy or fulfilled, and decide that they need their freedom.
This causes them to start looking for somebody better than their spouse, which often leads to a break up. This kind of thought process is “I” centered.
If you want to have a happy marriage, you need to learn how to respect and care for your spouse. So, be prepared to set aside your selfish desires for a better marriage because it takes more than “love”(or at least what seems to be today’s version of “love”) for a happy and lasting marriage.