Mastering the Art of the Apology
Many people have a surprisingly hard time apologizing to their wives or husbands. They’ll go out of their way to be extra nice to their partners when they realize they have wronged them, but won’t say “I’m sorry”.
A sincere apology can be quite powerful against many relationship problems. It goes a long way in solving relationship problems and restoring a damaged relationship by bringing forgiveness and healing between spouses and eliminating bitterness.
Apologizing also helps to get rid of a guilty conscience, which is beneficial to the offender. A guilty conscience can damage one’s self –esteem and eventually bring about more marital problems.
Additionally, apologizing helps to maintain respect between you and your spouse by giving the offended party the chance to forgive. It allows him or her to feel secure in the fact that you did not mean to hurt them and are not going to let it happen again.
Learning to apologize effectively takes time and practice. With time, you will be able to say ‘I’m sorry’ more easily and frequently whenever you do something wrong. You’ll also find that your partner forgives you more easily and therefore you are able to avoid additional relationship problems and tension.
Saying you’re Sorry
An effective apology begins by admitting responsibility for any damage caused. This works better than attempting to justify your actions which could be taken to be a sign of arrogance. However, if you don’t think you did anything wrong, you may not be ready to apologize just yet. It’s hard to give a sincere apology when you believe you are completely innocent.
Recognizing and understanding the nature of your mistake and the impact it has on your partner helps you to be specific in your apology. It helps you avoid saying things like “I’m sorry if I …” The words ‘if’ and ‘but’ should never feature anywhere in your apology as they make it sound half-hearted.
Even when you have a truly valid reason for your actions, it is better to apologize first and then offer an explanation. Lastly, an effective apology should be heartfelt and express some magnitude of remorse.