Work spouse relationships usually start out completely innocent, just a couple of co-workers bonding over common interests or grabbing lunch together. However, with time, work spouses become more and more attached and the relationship evolves into an emotional affair.

Having someone to laugh with and have honest conversations with in a high-intensity work environment is very addictive. But how do you know when you’re getting dangerously close to affair territory?

You’re spending more time at work

An office spouse can make being at work a lot more enjoyable. So if you find yourself spending a lot more time at work and your workload is not increasing, it might be because you want to spend more time with your colleague. This can cause intimacy issues in your marriage because you’re essentially choosing to spend time with a colleague over your real spouse.

You’re hiding your communication with your colleague from your spouse

Does your heart skip a beat when your wife or husband picks up your phone? Do you worry that your spouse might find out that you’re texting or calling your colleague? This may be a sign that things between you and your colleague are not as innocent as you’d like to believe they are.

You don’t want your partner to meet your work spouse

Your colleague probably knows that you’re married but has he or she met your spouse? Have you gone out of your way to ensure that they don’t meet? That might be because you’re secretly attracted to your coworker so you don’t want them to see that you’re “taken.” Out of sight, out of mind.

You always have lunch with the same coworker

There’s nothing wrong with having lunch with your favorite coworker when you need to vent but if it’s becoming a regular thing, it may be time to expand your support network. You should have more than one person that you can talk to about work.

Having a work spouse is generally a bad idea, especially if you’re married. Your spouse could find out and get jealous or you could end up having an emotional affair with them. So, if you have a work wife or husband, it’s time to rethink that friendship.