Many married couples spend most of their married life in a semi-happy state. Their marriages are not bad enough to be considered troubled but also not good enough to be fulfilling.

Sadly, between 55 and 65% of all divorces hail from these kinds of low-conflict, unfulfilling marriages. This shows that getting along reasonably well and good roommate-like relationship is not enough to keep a marriage going.

An Unfulfilling Marriage

People who complain about their marriages being unfulfilling are often accused of having unrealistic standards or being unwilling to tolerate the up and downs of married life. This is an unfair judgment. Many so-so marriages are the way they are because they are lacking in important areas such as physical and emotional intimacy.

However, there’s a difference between a comfortable and settled marriage that feels good to both you and your spouse, and unfulfilling marriage where you spend most of your days fantasizing about a better life. The former is a healthy relationship but the latter is an unfulfilling one.

Have a relationship with god

Getting married doesn’t mean that you should lose your relationship with God. Christian matrimony is a lot more satisfying when you share your spiritual lives with each other. This can be through studying God’s word, attending church and praying together regularly.

Support each other’s hobbies and interests

Just because you’re married doesn’t mean that your lives have to revolve around each other. You need to have your own interests and support each other’s interests. You don’t have to become obsessed with each other’s hobbies, but you need to show support them and not roll your eyes whenever they are brought up or make your partner feel guilty about having hobbies.

Have clear ground rules for your relationship

One reason why marriages end up in that semi-happy state is because there are no ground rules. A marriage without ground rules is built on a shaky foundation and can easily be derailed by a small incident. As a couple, you need guidelines that inform how much time you spend together as a couple, how they support each other’s careers and interests, how you deal with conflict and other important things. .

Many people assume that married life is supposed to be semi-happy and just somewhat fulfilling. This is, however, not the case. There are steps that couples can take to get out of that so-so state and have a more fulfilling marriage.