Wouldn’t it be nice if being married meant you could put the rest of your life on hold and focus on spending time with your partner? Unfortunately, this is not the case.

A married couple can easily end up in a long distance relationship due to work and other commitments. Military men and women, for instance, have to be away from their spouses for long periods of time. Such separation, if not well handled, can put a strain on the marriage.

How to Keep a Long Distance Relationship

There are a few things that a couple in a long distance marriage can do to maintain a healthy relationship.

First of all, do away with expectations of what your marriage should be. It is no use imagining what it would be like to live with your spouse under the same roof while he or she is away. In fact, it can make you bitter and cause you to resent your spouse for being away.

Instead, make a commitment to stay in touch with your spouse as much as possible. Maintain good communication in marriage through phone calls, text messages and any other technology that you are comfortable with. This will allow you to stay updated on your spouse’s progress at work.

You, on the other hand, can inform your partner about what is happening at home. If you have kids, let them talk to him or her. Knowing that things at home are just fine will help your significant other to remain focused at work.

This is not to say that you should lie to your spouse if all is not well. Be honest but not brutally so. Giving too little information may lead your spouse to believe that you are keeping something from him or her. Giving too many gory details, on the other hand, may cause your partner to feel guilty for being away at such as difficult time.

Communicating every day sounds nice and romantic but it may not be practical for you. You should set rules that you can both follow comfortably. This way, none of you will feel offended if the other doesn’t call multiple times a day.

A long distance marriage can bring up insecurities in the most confident people. For this reason, you may also need a set of rules to govern your conduct during your time apart. Don’t go out for lunch with a colleague of the opposite sex if you suspect that it might bother your partner. If you do, be open about it because the last thing you want is for your spouse to think you are keeping things from him or her.

Keeping in touch is the secret to a successful long distance relationship. It reduces the stress associated with being apart and keeps both of you from becoming too lonely. It is also a great way to assure each other of your love and commitment to the marriage.