Secrets To A Happier Marriage Part 2: You Know Where Your Dirty Socks Go!
Busy Busy Busy
Life has never been busier. So why should one spouse do most of the work around the house?
If you and your spouse have careers and children, then you really need to make sure each of you is pulling your own weight or else resentment will mount pretty fast and explode into a big mess.
Do whatever you can to refrain from taking advantage of each other. Although some gender-specific roles remain, it really does take mutual cooperation between a husband to juggle everything that needs to be juggled in this day and age of modern families.
Guess what. A wife can take the car in for an oil change just as easily as her husband can these days with jiffy lubes on every corner (not quite but you know what I’m saying).
And a husband can throw a load of laundry into the washer as easily as his wife.
When you see something that needs to be done then do it – don’t wait for your spouse to take care of it, thereby giving yourself a free ride.
How Committed Are You?
When you stop to think about it, pitching in to help with the household responsibilities is a demonstration of commitment. It shows that you honor and care for one another, too.
The Ugly Truth
According to studies, domestic chores are a source of severe conflict between husbands and wives because one spouse feels as if he or she does most of the work while receiving little or no help from the other.
No one wants to work from sunrise to sunset (and beyond) without a break. It’s too much to ask. It’s a pace that would exhaust anyone. Little to no time is left for yourself to enjoy life; this creates feelings of resentment and bitterness.
When Only One Spouse Works…(Careful)
When one spouse has a career and then other doesn’t, then it’s only natural for many of the household responsibilities to rest with the spouse who isn’t pursuing a career at this time.
BUT even then, there’s room for sharing some of the responsibilities.
No Matter What Make Sure…
…you have time for each other – and falling exhausted into bed in a comatose state at the end of the day doesn’t count.
One of the best ways to make sure you have time for each other is to divide the household chores and parenting responsibilities so energy remains to enjoy each other.
Some of the more familiar chores couples may consider dividing, are: taking out the garbage, laundry, dishes, grocery shopping, making meals, taking care of the children, fueling and maintaining the cars, routine household maintenance, to name a few.
What are some chores from that list you could divvy up?
If the topic of household chores is a point of contention in your home, then I’d suggest you plan a relaxing evening for you and your spouse to talk about it.
This isn’t the time to nag or to manipulate or make them feel guilty. All you’re doing is discussing the situation together in a spirit of mutual understanding and caring.
It could be that your spouse really isn’t aware of everything that has to be done but once they’re made aware of the situation they’ll be more than happy to step up and share the load.
It probably sounds kind of mundane, but sharing the household chores and responsibilities is one of the secrets of staying madly in love.