How To Save Your Marriage From An Affair
Betrayal often leads to marital separation and divorce.
But, typically, there are other problems within the marriage that preceded and triggered the affair.
A cheating wife or husband is usually the outcome of an underlying conflict that continues to fester and remain unresolved.
This is why it’s so important to address problems as they arise so the marriage can be protected. This habit further guards against adultery.
Ignoring problems hoping that they will take care of themselves, or leaving them unaddressed for too long, only worsens the situation. And as anger increases intimacy decreases.
Seeking satisfaction outside of the marriage – emotional or sexual – is the road to ending the relationship.
If you’re flirting with the idea of cheating, then consider it a warning sign of a deeper problem in your marriage that needs to be dealt with immediately.
When unmet needs persist in a marriage, infidelity is a heightened risk.
One solution to this dangerous situation is to reorganize your daily schedule for you and your spouse to have more time alone with one another.
After all, you are each other’s first priority. Every couple requires quality time together for developing a strong relationship.
So plan a date night, have lunch together, watch a movie or get involved in activities that interest you both. Share your goals, hopes and feelings concerning marriage problems and issues.
See your husband or wife as your first priority and best friend.
Money problems are another source of conflict that triggers affairs.
When a couple struggles to meet their financial obligations, deal with debt, or pay rent, while at the same time worrying about losing/keeping their source(s) of income, they face a situation that exerts extreme stress on even the healthiest marriages.
Sometimes a spouse will use an affair as a coping mechanism for dealing with the tension. But instead of cheating, discuss the situation with your partner and explore solutions and strategies together.
If you’re in a situation where you’ve discovered infidelity exists but desire to save your marriage, then take action now. These steps will help restore the relationship:
1. Confess the affair to your spouse and let him or her know that you want to save the marriage no matter what it takes.
2. End the relationship with your lover – or the person with whom you’re emotionally involved.
3. Inform your spouse that you have ended the affair.
4. Apologize for your mistake and, without justifying or defending your actions, honestly share the real reason why you had an affair.
Although this can be a painful process that requires great amounts of time and patience, most spouses are willing to offer their forgiveness, and work towards having a healthy, happy marriage.
5. Be faithful. Period. Repeated betrayal destroys trust.
6. Put strategies into place to prevent future mistakes. Explain to your spouse the measures you are taking to keep your promises and save the marriage.
Unfortunately, marital infidelity is a reality for far too many marriages.
But the good news is that it can be worked through and the marriage not only be saved, but you can reignite your love, trust and happiness once again to have a relationship that can…and will…endure anything.