Photo by Sarah Cervantes on Unsplash

Your spouse is probably the most important person in the universe to you. I say “probably” because I assume you love them madly, which isn’t the case for some couples. 

But in a healthy and happy relationship, your spouse is your world. You treasure them and care more for your partner than anything else in your life. 

However, the hustle and bustle of life, stress, exhaustion, and overwhelm can make you take your significant other for granted, and before long, neither of you is getting your needs met.

The good news is you can reignite the spark; your marriage can thrive and flourish! 

Here are some ways to stay connected and build a loving, nurturing, and intimate relationship with your spouse, the love of your life.

Tips to Keeping the Spark Alive in Your Relationship

Look at these tips to help you and your partner stay connected.

Schedule Date Nights

A strong relationship can survive almost anything, but you have to work at it and put the effort in to keep your relationship strong and healthy.

Scheduling weekly date nights and intimate weekend getaways where you spend quality and quantity time together makes a huge difference in strengthening the bond between you. 

Take time apart from work, friends, and family to flame the fires of romance and stay connected physically, emotionally, mentally, and spiritually.

In fact, studies show that couples who prioritize regular date nights are less likely to break up by almost 14%!

Communicate Your Needs

Your marriage should be an environment where you can express your thoughts, needs, and desires without fear or criticism.

It should also be a safe space to discuss sensitive or difficult topics without fear of being judged, minimized, or rejected.

Loving someone doesn’t mean pretending everything is always fine and peachy. 

When something is bothering you, you should be able to say it instead of keeping it to yourself for fear of triggering an argument.

Your partner should also feel the same way. Try not to be defensive when your spouse voices their concerns.

Maintaining safe, open, and honest communication is one of the most effective things you can do to keep your relationship healthy and the spark alive.

Appreciate Your Partner’s Differences

Couples never agree on everything all the time. Arguments happen, which leads to hurt feelings and resentment. 

Learn how to argue constructively rather than using each other as punching bags to air your grievances.

What’s the best way to argue constructively? Respect each other’s different points of view. Stop making assumptions and judgments about why you think your spouse said or did what they said or did!

You might also try this: express gratitude for your partner. Why? Because it encourages and brings out more of what you admire about them.

Gratitude elicits appreciation. When you show your spouse genuine gratitude, they will show you genuine appreciation.

Also, stop acting like Perry Mason by bringing up stuff from the past to support your case regarding why you have a reason to be mad and ugly. If you’ve dealt with it, leave it be. If you’ve not dealt with it, choose a better way to address the matter rather than dumping on your spouse; perhaps seek the help of a marriage counselor or therapist.

Lastly, don’t play the blame game. Forgive. 

Embracing forgiveness releases you from feelings of hurt and resentment.

Once you release the past, you can start loving your partner for who they are. Eventually, you’ll enjoy being with them and seeing them in this new context.

Be More Affectionate

Everyone expresses love and affection differently. In fact, experts claim there are five love languages. Do you know your spouse’s love language? Do they know yours?

Make an effort to discover your partner’s love language to gain an appreciation for everything they do for you.

The opposite is also true. 

Your spouse should also know your love language to keep your marriage healthy and thriving.

When you know each other’s love language and express your love and affection for them through it, you make them feel wanted and desired. 

Keep Doing The Little Things…

No matter how long you’ve been married, keep doing the “little things” throughout the day to show how much you cherish your spouse. Whether making their favorite beverage in the morning and bringing it to them, getting the paper for them, texting “I love you,” or making their favorite meal. 

What little things can you start doing?

Little things matter; they tend to solidify your relationship and remove doubt. And they just make you feel special.

See Them Through Other People’s Eyes

Just as spending time alone is essential, it’s equally important to spend time with others. Why? Because social connection improves your overall well-being, and it’s good to see your partner through the eyes of others and be reminded of all the great qualities you love about them that others notice and appreciate.

Spending time with their colleagues can also be enlightening because it gives you an insight into their skills and capabilities; as they engage their workmates, you’ll see how cool, personable, and fun they are.

Radiating from the core of these tips that I’ve just shared are gratitude, respect, love, intimacy, and appreciation. 

Imagine the kind of marriage you could have if these attributes were a daily reality in your relationship? Maybe they already are, and this article served as a good reminder. 

But if they’re not, be of good courage because you’re just one choice away from making things better today than they were yesterday. All you have to do is pick one of these tips and get started. Be brave. You can do it. Begin unlocking your best marriage today.