The Art of Giving Compliments
Many people believe that compliments for women don’t have to be sincere as long as they are flattering. Unfortunately, this isn’t true, especially in marriage. Most people would rather receive simple, specific and honest compliments from their spouses than vague and dishonest flattery.
How to Give Compliments
Specific compliments sound more sincere than general ones. Referencing a specific achievement in a compliment shows that you have thought about it. If possible, you should go into detail about the achievement because it makes the compliment more memorable. Reference any of your spouse’s traits that may have contributed to the achievement. For instance, instead of just saying “That’s a nice dress,” say “That’s a nice dress. It brings out your beautiful blue eyes.” The best compliments for women and men acknowledge the achievement as well as the person.
Sincere compliments are timely. Waiting too long makes it seem as if you are giving the compliment out of obligation. If your spouse successfully completes a project, compliment him or her within a day or two. Also, be sure to speak from the heart when giving compliments. There is no need to plan and rehearse what you are going to say.
Sincere compliments stem from genuine admiration. Your spouse can probably tell when you genuinely admire him or her so don’t try to fake admiration. Also, compliments are like gifts; you can’t expect one in return. You also can’t give a compliment and then ask for a favor. Such compliments don’t count and only set you up for disappointment.
Never make a comparison while giving a compliment. You don’t need to criticize one thing in order to bring out the value of another. For instance, if you compliment your wife on her dress, don’t say that it’s much better than another one of her dresses. That is a backhanded compliment because it gives with one hand and takes away with the other. Also, avoid comparative and superlative words like better or worse.
Giving sincere compliments is a great way to boost your partner’s confidence and make him or her feel appreciated. However, they is an art to it. Compliments for women and compliments for guys should be specific, timely and genuine.