The holidays are right around the corner but you probably have no idea what you’re going to give your wife or husband. You’ve probably spent hours researching thoughtful gifts but you still can’t pick a gift and it’s making you anxious.

Buying a gift for a significant other comes with a lot of pressure regardless of how long you have been married. Gifts are a love language so they are seen as a reflection of the giver’s feelings towards the recipient.

Bearing in mind that your spouse is going to “read into” the gift and possibly use it as measure of your feelings, it is very important that you get them thoughtful gifts. Frantically searching the internet for romantic ideas for him or her at the last minute isn’t going to cut it.

Things to Keep in Mind when Buying Gifts for Your Spouse

The wrong gift can result in resentment from your spouse so here are some things to keep in mind when picking a gift.

• Clothing can be a good gift if you get the size, style and color right. However, since there are so many potential pitfalls, you’re more likely to get it wrong. And if you, for instance, get the size wrong, your spouse will overanalyze the situation and come to the conclusion that you’re trying to hint that they should lose some weight. It’s why gift cards are so popular.
• Gifts that imply that there’s something wrong with your spouse are always a bad idea. These include gym memberships or equipment, and make-up or cooking lessons. Your spouse is bound to read into these gifts so it’s best to avoid them all together.
• Appliances are almost always a bad idea. Unless it is something that your spouse really wants and they have expressed as much, they probably not be happy.
• Gifts that create more work for your spouse are not very thoughtful. If you get your spouse something that requires assembling, put it together yourself or get someone else to do this. Making your spouse assemble his or her own gift is not a very thoughtful thing to do.

The secret to buying thoughtful gifts for your significant other is to actually consider all aspects and identify potential pit falls. Gifts that seem wonderful at face value can lead to marriage problems if you’re not careful.