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Marriage Tips: How to Split Household Chores with your Spouse

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Marriage Tips: How to Split Household Chores with your Spouse

On November 28, 2014, Posted by , In All Posts,Avoid Divorce,Communication,Happy Marriage, With 5 Comments

Household chores are a source of conflict in many marriages. This is because most couples have trouble negotiating the division of chores.  It’s no wonder that most couples in modern marriages – where both spouses are working – are constantly looking for marriage tips on how to split household chores.

Common Mistakes Couples Make When Splitting Household Chores

Many couples aim for a 50-50 split when splitting chores. Unfortunately, this is the worst way to go about it. In fact, studies have shown that couples who split their chores 50-50 are more likely to experience marital problems that lead to divorce.  The main issue with the 50-50 split is that there is no way of knowing whether you and spouse are “even” unless you keep score.  And keeping score in a marriage never ends well.

Many couples ignore each other’s preferences with regard to chores. Unfortunately, this is also a recipe for disaster. For instance, you may be the type of person who can live with clutter but can’t stand dirt and your spouse may be the exact opposite.  It is important that these preferences are reflected in how the chores are split. It may be more practical for the person who can’t stand dirt to do the bulk of the cleaning while the person who can’t stand clutter tidy’s up.

Many couples do not seek outside help. This is because they mistakenly believe that as long as they split the chores fairly, all will be well. The truth, however, is that you can still be overwhelmed no matter how fairly you split the chores.  For this reason, it is perfectly okay to hire help. In addition, if you have kids, make sure they are doing their fair share. It teaches them responsibility.

Marriage Tips: How to split household chores

  • List all the household chores which need to be done – Before you can divide the chores, you need to agree on what they are. So sit down and list everything that goes into running a household. This includes not only daily chores such as vacuuming and dishes but also things like paying the bills and mowing the lawn.
  • Identify chores that you enjoy doing – You and your spouse should go through the list and identify chores that you enjoy doing, prefer to do or don’t mind doing.
  • Share the remaining responsibilities – once you have each picked the chores that you actually would like to do, you’ll be left with a list of chores that are unpleasant for both of you. One way to split such chores is to assign them depending on who wants them done most.
  • Help each other with the chores – Just because you are not assigned a particular chore doesn’t mean that you should never do it. You should make an effort to help your spouse with the chores because you love and care about him/her.

How you split household chores with your spouse can lead to marital problems if you are not careful.  Follow these marriage tips to ensure that you get it right.