EVERY marriage has its challenges and disappointments. But even with our human imperfections, it is possible to enjoy a lifetime of unity, intimacy, and profound joy with your spouse.

Last week’s tip for a happier marriage was simple but powerful. Decide to give your relationship a fresh start.

Here is another essential tip for building a happier, stronger marriage.

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Love Is Spelled “TIME”

Research shows that even a few intentional hours together each week can significantly strengthen a marriage. And couples who are struggling often need even more focused, consistent time together to reconnect.

So here is a question worth asking.

How many hours do you and your spouse actually spend together each week? Not just in the same house, but truly engaged with each other. You and your spouse deserve both quality and quantity time together.

But as long as time together stays in the category of something you “should” do, it probably will not happen.

You have to make it a “must.” When it becomes a must, you will make room for it.

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Learning to Say “No”

When time together becomes a priority, something else has to give. That often means saying “no” more often. And that is not a bad thing. It is a healthy thing.

Start saying “no” to others so you can start saying “yes” to each other. It might mean scheduling fewer activities for the kids. Sometimes they are busier than we are. It might mean cutting back on endless commitments or turning off the TV more often.

Studies suggest people can spend close to 28 hours a week watching TV. That is a lot of time that could be invested in your marriage instead. It might also mean taking better care of yourself so you have the energy to connect at the end of the day instead of simply collapsing on the couch.

Say “no” to the unimportant so you can say “yes” to what matters most.

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Ways You Can Do Time Together

It is a funny thing. When you first started dating, you could not get enough time together. It did not have to be anything special. Just being together was enough.

Remember those days? They are not gone. You just have to be intentional again.

Here are a few ideas to get you started:

• Do something fun with friends
• Go out for a special meal
• Go to a ball game
• Attend a play
• Go to the movies
• Snuggle on the sofa and watch your favorite movie
• Cuddle with candles and soft music
• Take a trip
• Go to church
• Go for a sunset walk
• Enjoy an afternoon at the beach or mountains
• Go on a picnic
• Go for a slow, leisurely ride

The activity is not the most important thing. The time together is.

Just make sure it is something you both enjoy.

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Make This a Must

If you want your marriage to grow, time together cannot be optional. It has to be protected.

One of the best ways to do that is to schedule it. Put it on your calendar and guard it.

Do not feel guilty when you tell someone you are already booked.

Because you are. You are booked with your spouse.

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Decide

Decide that once it is scheduled, you are not backing out unless something truly serious happens. Nothing is more important than your relationship and your marriage.

Yes, your kids are important. Your responsibilities matter. Your relationship with your Creator matters deeply. But your marriage is one of the core relationships that shapes everything else.

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Your Next Step

If you want to stay madly in love, and we know you do, then schedule at least one date night within the next ten days.

Not someday. Not when things slow down.

Within the next ten days.

Still here?

Go ahead and put it on your calendar.

Right now.