Negativity and pessimism are death to a marriage. How do they enter a relationship? You either allow or bring them in. Many spouses make the mistake of forcing their partner to be more positive, but that’s not where you start. (You see where we’re going with this line of reasoning.) 

Let’s break it down and take an honest look at our attitude. 

What kind of relationship can you hope to have if you constantly expect the worst to happen or assume the worst about your partner? 

Is it possible to have anything other than a disappointing relationship when you expect to be let down or disappointed? And can you possibly imagine how disempowering it is to your partner for you to constantly assume the worst about them?

Furthermore, a pessimistic attitude triggers anxiety and depression and increases stress. (https://www.psychologytoday.com/intl/basics/pessimism).

Optimism, which is pessimism’s polar opposite, is immensely beneficial to your life and marriage. One of the easiest ways to improve your relationship immediately is to start being more positive and optimistic! 

Optimism Is A Blessing to Your Marriage

Couples with a shared level of optimism tend to be more successful in their relationships. When you have faith in the future success of your relationship, you are more likely to give it your best and work hard to maintain it.

The reverse is also true. People who think their partner will leave eventually or don’t deserve them tend to withhold the required effort to build a healthy, lasting relationship. (https://sites.psu.edu/aspsy/2018/04/09/optimism-in-romantic-relationships/).

A positive, cheerful, optimistic attitude is a very attractive trait; it’s magnetic!

Optimism is contagious!

Optimism is an empowering force that allows you to build a mutually satisfying relationships. 

Optimism and Your Mental Health

People who practice optimism may experience improved mental health. An optimistic outlook tends to reduce stress levels because you’re less concerned about things going wrong. Being less stressed means that you’re less likely to experience feelings of anxiety and depression. (https://www.mayoclinic.org/healthy-lifestyle/stress-management/in-depth/positive-thinking/art-20043950).

Obtaining an optimistic outlook begins by choosing to acknowledge that you’re a person of value and worth with something to offer. It’s choosing to believe that you deserve happiness, love, and success. It’s choosing to see the silver lining, breaking free from feeling inadequate and imagining the worst outcomes. 

Additionally, positive thinking and self-talk help sustain an optimistic outlook.

Having a vision for your life – having something to live for – and living with hope are also pillars of optimism. 

An optimistic outlook creates opportunities. You’ll have a happier life and a much more satisfying marriage. 

Optimism and Your Physical Health

According to WebMD, stress takes an emotional and physical toll. The symptoms of chronic stress can include: (https://www.webmd.com/balance/stress-management/stress-symptoms-effects_of-stress-on-the-body#2#:~:text=Stress%20is%20the%20body%27s%20reaction%20to%20harmful%20situations,response.%20During%20stress%20response%2C%20your%20heart%20rate%20increases%2C).

• Nervousness
• Insomnia
• Headaches
• Low energy levels
• Stomach issues
• Muscle pain
• Cardiovascular issues
• Weakened immune system
• Skin issues
• Weight problems 
• Issues in our personal relationships

Feeling better improves your marriage. A pessimistic attitude significantly contributes to stress, which harms your marriage. If you want a happier marriage, find ways to reduce your stress levels to feel calmer and be less reactive.

Final Thoughts

If you’re mentally and physically exhausted and constantly feel that you don’t measure up – that you don’t deserve love, happiness, and success – you’re likely living on the more negative side of life. Here’s the good news: You may choose to leave that side of life as soon as you wish.

Deciding to live with an optimistic outlook might not seem easy when old feelings and beliefs still grip you. But, change begins with choice; choosing to be optimistic weakens pessimism’s barbed grip. Optimism is the superpower that unlocks your best life and marriage.